So I realize that I dont actually suck at life. But as of late I feel that way. I am a horrible primary teacher, I suck a being a friend, I have a short fuse with the kids I babysit, I dont want to do my light duty work anymore, and the list goes on and on. I found this quote from Dieter F. Uchtdorf the other day and it got me thinking:
"In stories, as in life, adversity teaches us things we cannot learn otherwise. Adversity helps to develop a depth of character that comes in no other way. Our loving Heavenly Father has set us in a world filled with challenges and trials so that we, through opposition, can learn wisdom, become stronger, and experience joy."
I really like this quote. It pretty much sums up that the things I am going through are just my Heavenly Fathers tests for me. He wouldnt give me something I couldnt handle. I need to know that, and learn from it. Strive to be a better primary teacher, be a better friend, be kind, choose my words wisely and realize that I am lucky to have a job. I am in no way perfect, I wont wake up tomorrow and all my problems will be solved. This I know. But if everyday I work towards a goal, and stick to that goal, eventually I will reach it.
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Friday, October 7, 2011
Shoulder Surgery...its a little rough!
Its been exactly a week since my shoulder surgery and while my shoulder feels better than before, I still hurt, all the time. Not exactly what I call fun. When it takes longer to blow dry your hair than to watch a 30 minute television show, you will feel my pain. I shouldn't complain, I know that after all of this my shoulder will be as good as new. Its just so dang frustrating right now. It hurts to put on a shirt, to take off a shirt, to brush my teeth, to brush my hair...you get the idea. Eventually(4 months from now) it wont hurt, and thats what I need to focus on.
I thought I would tell you all what exactly happend last Friday, because, well its kinda interesting!
Friday September 30, I woke up at 0445, took a shower and did my hair. Yes, I did my hair. Im probably the only person on the planet who would think of doing my hair just to go into surgery...but what can I say? Once we arrived at the hospital we waited for just a few minutes until they took me back to Pre-Op. There they started and IV and I basically hung out for about an hour. Of course once I went to turn on the television to distract myself, everyone and their mom came in to talk to me! I opted to get a nerve block for my shoulder. NO this was not instead of being put under! If your going to come at me with a knife and mess around in my body, I will not be awake for that! In hindsight the nerve block was the best decision I ever made! While it was happening, I was thinking otherwise. IT HURT! Im not exactly sure what they did but it felt like a huge plastic piece being shoved into my neck and the doctor pushing a needle through said plastic piece. Now, while I did have drugs on board, I had to stay awake in order for me to tell them if/when my arm would twitch. It was not a pleasant experience, but afterwards when I couldnt feel my arm for 24 hours, totally worth it!!
The surgery lasted about an hour and a half. I woke up in PACU-Post Acute Care Unit- and was super groggy. My nurse saw I was awake and immediatly sat me straight up, 90 degrees! Um...not cool! I went super pale, and was super nauseous. She gave me Zofran and layed me back down. A little while later she did the same exact thing. Again, not cool. Same effect. This time they gave me Phenergan and layed me back down. The third time she tried to sit me up, I told her I would do it myself and slowly sat myself up. It worked!! All was looking well and that I was going to get to go home soon!! Except once they got me into the chair and off oxygen I wasnt able to keep my oxygen sat's up. Crap. They were threatening to keep me overnight and after about 2 hours of my sat's dropping, I was finally able to keep them above 90 for 20 minutes and was released to go home!!
I spent most of the next few days in a pain pill induced sleep state. That and this amazing ice machiene they gave us, was pretty much the only way I could stay happy. On Sunday, I felt a little bit better and decided to go to lunch a movie with my dad. I think I slept through most of the movie! Maybe going out was a little ambitious that day!
All in all it was a rough surgery, and Im sure it was a rough recovery. The good news is that while my shoulder was a mess, nothing was torn! It ended up being a burst bursa, a bone spur and a massive clean up of my shoulder. It will be a long recovery but I dont have to be in a sling for any amount of time!
My shoulder with the HUGE bandage on it! It seriously was all tape. Im pretty sure they used the whole dang roll!!
What my shoulder looks like underneath the bandage. There are three "puncture wounds". One on the front(you cant see), one on the side and one on the back.
I thought I would tell you all what exactly happend last Friday, because, well its kinda interesting!
Friday September 30, I woke up at 0445, took a shower and did my hair. Yes, I did my hair. Im probably the only person on the planet who would think of doing my hair just to go into surgery...but what can I say? Once we arrived at the hospital we waited for just a few minutes until they took me back to Pre-Op. There they started and IV and I basically hung out for about an hour. Of course once I went to turn on the television to distract myself, everyone and their mom came in to talk to me! I opted to get a nerve block for my shoulder. NO this was not instead of being put under! If your going to come at me with a knife and mess around in my body, I will not be awake for that! In hindsight the nerve block was the best decision I ever made! While it was happening, I was thinking otherwise. IT HURT! Im not exactly sure what they did but it felt like a huge plastic piece being shoved into my neck and the doctor pushing a needle through said plastic piece. Now, while I did have drugs on board, I had to stay awake in order for me to tell them if/when my arm would twitch. It was not a pleasant experience, but afterwards when I couldnt feel my arm for 24 hours, totally worth it!!
The surgery lasted about an hour and a half. I woke up in PACU-Post Acute Care Unit- and was super groggy. My nurse saw I was awake and immediatly sat me straight up, 90 degrees! Um...not cool! I went super pale, and was super nauseous. She gave me Zofran and layed me back down. A little while later she did the same exact thing. Again, not cool. Same effect. This time they gave me Phenergan and layed me back down. The third time she tried to sit me up, I told her I would do it myself and slowly sat myself up. It worked!! All was looking well and that I was going to get to go home soon!! Except once they got me into the chair and off oxygen I wasnt able to keep my oxygen sat's up. Crap. They were threatening to keep me overnight and after about 2 hours of my sat's dropping, I was finally able to keep them above 90 for 20 minutes and was released to go home!!
I spent most of the next few days in a pain pill induced sleep state. That and this amazing ice machiene they gave us, was pretty much the only way I could stay happy. On Sunday, I felt a little bit better and decided to go to lunch a movie with my dad. I think I slept through most of the movie! Maybe going out was a little ambitious that day!
All in all it was a rough surgery, and Im sure it was a rough recovery. The good news is that while my shoulder was a mess, nothing was torn! It ended up being a burst bursa, a bone spur and a massive clean up of my shoulder. It will be a long recovery but I dont have to be in a sling for any amount of time!
Saturday, September 24, 2011
So...Im a bit of a whiner
If your friends with me on Facebook or have been in the general vicinty of me for the past 3 months you most likely have heard something about my shoulder. People ask me everyday "Natalie, how are you feeling?" and everyday I tell them "My shoulder hurts and it sucks". Well, my shoulder does hurt, and yes trying to do things like blow dry your hair or put on a t-shirt when you can hardly lift your left shoulder without pain, sucks. But as my surgery date draws near, Ive come to realize one thing: Im a whiner. I complain far too much about something that in 6 short days will be fixed. I need to be thankful that I have two arms and that I have the opportunity to fix the one thats broken. There are people who are starving in this world, who walk around on broken legs, who are mistreated, and friends of mine who have had things go wrong in their lives and they are all much stronger than me. So Im going to take a minute to say what I am thankful for and give myself some perspective:
1. I am thankful for my health
2. I am thankful for my family and the support and love they give me every single day
3. I am thankful for my friends. They make me laugh, give me advice and are there for me when I need them most
4. Im thankful for my church and for my Heavenly Father. Without both of them, I wouldnt be the person I am today
5. Im thankful for my job
6. Im thankful for the Parkers. Without really knowing it, they got me through a very difficult and emotional time in my life, one which I dont think I could have gotten through without them
7. Im thankful for my testimony of the LDS church and Heavenly Father
8. Im thankful for sweatpants, chocolate, Dr Pepper and Cheese Its...I love you all
9. Im thankful for all the little kids I get the pleasure in babysitting. I get my baby fix, to watch silly movies and play dress up and its all okay!
10. Im thankful for my best friend Sam, more than she will ever know. She is always there for me, tells me how it is, gives me advice, and tells me what to do when I simply have no idea.
I am thankful for tons of other things to, but I didnt want to bore anyone. I have realized that while my shoulder does hurt, its a little thing. I should be thankful I have a shoulder that hurts. And yes I got hurt at work, but work is doing something I love, so at least I got hurt doing something I love. I hope this helps me from here on out and that I realize how truly blessed I really am.
1. I am thankful for my health
2. I am thankful for my family and the support and love they give me every single day
3. I am thankful for my friends. They make me laugh, give me advice and are there for me when I need them most
4. Im thankful for my church and for my Heavenly Father. Without both of them, I wouldnt be the person I am today
5. Im thankful for my job
6. Im thankful for the Parkers. Without really knowing it, they got me through a very difficult and emotional time in my life, one which I dont think I could have gotten through without them
7. Im thankful for my testimony of the LDS church and Heavenly Father
8. Im thankful for sweatpants, chocolate, Dr Pepper and Cheese Its...I love you all
9. Im thankful for all the little kids I get the pleasure in babysitting. I get my baby fix, to watch silly movies and play dress up and its all okay!
10. Im thankful for my best friend Sam, more than she will ever know. She is always there for me, tells me how it is, gives me advice, and tells me what to do when I simply have no idea.
I am thankful for tons of other things to, but I didnt want to bore anyone. I have realized that while my shoulder does hurt, its a little thing. I should be thankful I have a shoulder that hurts. And yes I got hurt at work, but work is doing something I love, so at least I got hurt doing something I love. I hope this helps me from here on out and that I realize how truly blessed I really am.
Friday, September 23, 2011
20 Things You May Not Know About Me
1. I am mildly OCD. The volume on something has to be on an even number at all times, I check the front door 3 times before I go to sleep for the night, and all my clothes are organized by color and style.
2. I love Dr Pepper...and I do mean love!
3. I hate the word "moist"...it grosses me out
4. My favorite movie of all time is "Gone With The Wind"
5. Ive seen a lot of gross things, even touched a lot of gross things but I absolutly hate putting my hand inside a dish/pot that just held food in it. Something about the texture...yuck!!!
6. I am the nicest, sweetest person who would do anything for anybody. But once you make me mad, forget it
7. Going along with #6, I hold grudges forever and I dont easily forgive. Even though I know sometimes I need to let it go
8. I spend hours on the computer trying to find quotes or sayings that match perfectly with what Im feeling
9. I LOVE sports! Football, Basketball, Baseball, Hockey, all of them! Cant play them to save my life...but I love going to them and watching!
10. I still listen to Backstreet Boys, Nsync, Spice Girls and Britney....it makes me happy!
11. All of my friends will tell you that I am "too picky" when it comes to guys. Im not picky....I just have standards.
12. I complain about my job a lot, but honestly I wouldnt change jobs if you paid me. I love my job and it brings me such joy and happiness in my life
13. I need to be better about working out and eating healthier foods. Right now, I suck at it
14. I have had 5 major surgeries in my life; 4 of which had to do with my heart, 1 was my wisdom teeth. And Im about to have my 6th next Friday
15. My scrubs wardrobe rivals my regular wardrobe
16. Someday my house will look like it just came out of a Pottery Barn magazine
17. Its probably safe to say that I am addicted to chapstick. I cant go anywhere without it!!
18. I want to get married, I want to have kids. I just haven't found the right guy to do that with yet
19. The people that I work with are amazing. They are the greatest bunch of nurses, doctors, and techs that I have ever worked with. I love them all!
20. I hate doing laundry. HATE it! If I could pay someone to do my laundry...I totally would!!!
2. I love Dr Pepper...and I do mean love!
3. I hate the word "moist"...it grosses me out
4. My favorite movie of all time is "Gone With The Wind"
5. Ive seen a lot of gross things, even touched a lot of gross things but I absolutly hate putting my hand inside a dish/pot that just held food in it. Something about the texture...yuck!!!
6. I am the nicest, sweetest person who would do anything for anybody. But once you make me mad, forget it
7. Going along with #6, I hold grudges forever and I dont easily forgive. Even though I know sometimes I need to let it go
8. I spend hours on the computer trying to find quotes or sayings that match perfectly with what Im feeling
9. I LOVE sports! Football, Basketball, Baseball, Hockey, all of them! Cant play them to save my life...but I love going to them and watching!
10. I still listen to Backstreet Boys, Nsync, Spice Girls and Britney....it makes me happy!
11. All of my friends will tell you that I am "too picky" when it comes to guys. Im not picky....I just have standards.
12. I complain about my job a lot, but honestly I wouldnt change jobs if you paid me. I love my job and it brings me such joy and happiness in my life
13. I need to be better about working out and eating healthier foods. Right now, I suck at it
14. I have had 5 major surgeries in my life; 4 of which had to do with my heart, 1 was my wisdom teeth. And Im about to have my 6th next Friday
15. My scrubs wardrobe rivals my regular wardrobe
16. Someday my house will look like it just came out of a Pottery Barn magazine
17. Its probably safe to say that I am addicted to chapstick. I cant go anywhere without it!!
18. I want to get married, I want to have kids. I just haven't found the right guy to do that with yet
19. The people that I work with are amazing. They are the greatest bunch of nurses, doctors, and techs that I have ever worked with. I love them all!
20. I hate doing laundry. HATE it! If I could pay someone to do my laundry...I totally would!!!
Thursday, September 22, 2011
My First Blog....Ever
Ive never blogged before...ever. Mostly because Ive never really had anything to say that I thought anyone would care about. And if no one ever reads this, Im fine with that. At least I now have a place to write down my feelings. Many of you know I joined the LDS Church in January of this year. It has truly been a blessing in my life. You are supposed to write in a journal everyday, and basically I suck at it. Ive never done it. I never really got it in my mind that it was a good idea to do so, but this seems fun. So here goes nothing! Hope you enjoy this little window into my crazy, but so fun world!!
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